Photos from the Beat
Say it Right, dammit
Writers learn very early in their careers that, though not necessarily lucrative, their talents are in high demand.
Think about it. Who do you ask to proofread your cover letter and tweak your resume? Who do you call at 9 p.m. and just say "I'm thinking of a word..." ? Who do you ask to participate in an impromptu spelling bee in the office, when you're trying to send an e-mail that includes an 'i before e' ?
Chances are, it's the one person in your life who is known for being able to string a sentence together, whether it's their full-time job or not.
Over time, I've learned to embrace this phenomenon, especially after the six years I spent in middle school and high school being ridiculed for knowing what 'caustic' meant. I went to a small public school, where acting like a moron was championed.
I don't really get made fun of for knowing big words anymore, I think in part because, like all the nerds of the world, I've spun my geekiness into a career and an overall rewarding life, while the losers who failed to embrace their inner-dork wallow in a sea of mediocrity, recalling their glory days on the field hockey field.
But I do notice a new trend -- people sometimes seem scared to death to say a word wrong in my presence, like I'm going to unsheath my verbal machete and deliver them into a world of pain.
Most times, I won't.
But there is something that needs to be said in regard to butchering the English language. Communication is our greatest weapon, people. Don't be scared of it, just learn your way around it.
It's true that hearing words mispronounced or seeing the mispronunciation in print drives me absolutely batty. But what sends me into the stratosphere is when people try to act like Oxford Dons while they're speaking like a mongoloid. Slowly, I'm learning to embrace this inner-hatred, too. It's not that I'm a jerk. I just think if you don't know how to do something, and you plan on doing it, you should first learn how. You know, like flying a plane, or reading.
Just as a quick tutorial, here are a few I hear all the time:
• It's espresso, people, not 'expresso.' THERE IS NO X IN ES.PRESS.O. This is coffee, not a commuter train.
• Speaking of it's, it's = it is. Its denotes possession, like its foot, its hand, its crappy grammar.
• Supposably. Please tell me you know this is completely wrong.
• Valentimes Day. Hey everyone, it's time for a Valen! The new pharmaceutical that makes it ok to say the MOST COMMERCIAL HOLIDAY EVER wrong, despite the fact that it is plastered on every strip mall facade for the entire month of February.
• A trip to the doctor sometimes results in a PROSTATE exam. Stop saying you're getting your 'prostrate exam' immediately. You sound like a doink.
• One more time: there is no such word as 'irregardless.' Do not say irregardless, unless it is with a sense of irre-irony.
• Ok, every American on the planet gets this one wrong. And if you get it wrong in the U.K., you don't have to worry about me - everyone from the street sweeper to the bartender to the Prime Minister will snort and sigh in their understated British disgust. You PAY-tro-nize a restaurant, and you PAH-tro-nize a person, meaning you placate them. look it up.
• If you're on a date and you want to compliment the girl you're with, don't tell her she's articulated. She might be. You aren't.
• You cannot be orientated or disorientated. Putting more syllables in words doesn't make them more valuable.
• I think eight years of hearing President Bush say 'nucular' is quite enough, thank you. I am also sick of 'jew-le-ry.' And for the record, the 't'in often is silent.
I found dozens more here , but I had to stop reading because I was starting to crack my mouse with angry squeezing.
Isn't it production day? Did you axe GOB if you could blog?
